Perils of assimilation

If only life came with subtitles.

Sunday, September 13, 2009

I am going to lose my shnitzel, yo. I will put up with a lot of shit for a job, but we're approaching the deal-breaker threshold. It all started a few weeks ago, with the 5-year anniversary of the store I work at. There was a party outside that the employees weren't allowed to go to, but that I cooked most of the food for. I didn't have to, it was not my job but the buck was passed to me. No one ever said thank you.

The next day, expecting a return to normal, I waltzed in with a grin on my face. The store was pandemonium! People everywhere, all demanding my attention. I hauled sound equiptment inside, not realizing the pain I was about to be subjected to. Four solid hours of acoustic guitar! It just kept getting worse the next day: an electric guitarist with Muzak beats behind him.

Now it's keyboards. For HOURS. I have to hide in the back, ears covered and tears in my eyes. I cannot describe the intense emotional pain this man's playing subjects me to. It makes me want to hurt myself. I must quit this job, for once and for all.


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