Perils of assimilation

If only life came with subtitles.

Friday, August 21, 2009

The Neighborhood Bitch

I knew I wasn't well liked, but I never thought I was the neighborhood bitch. I had to call the cops on my neighbors tonight, some friends actually. I might've started a neighborhood war, but I think I made a good decision. When someone is screaming and another to get the fuck out of their house, and another neighbor is already yelling for them to shut up, it's time to shut it down. I am now the neighborhood bitch.

What ever happened to going out to a field to party? Aren't you supposed to hide your vices when you're seventeen.

Wednesday, August 19, 2009


When I was a kid, the co-op was where my mom would go to buy chicken feed and hay. You could get all sorts of stuff for your farm: silage when you were low, equipment, and gasoline. I remember it was across the street from the ET Lumber and the elementary school I went to. It's not there anymore, but now I go to a different sort of co-op.

I started going to the Just Local food Co-op in Eau Claire after running across a carrot mural during one of my nightly walks. Soon, I discovered if I got up early enough I could get a free cup of coffee from them at the farmer's market that took place on campus. It was my favorite place to stop during a bike ride.

Recently, I joined the Riverwest co-op here in Milwaukee. I had been there plenty of times before, and was always off-put by the icy hipsters that bumped into me as we tried to squeeze past each other. But the last time I was there, Everyone was so helpful, and I got a nice big bag of not too pretty, but totally edible veggies for free. I joined up that day.

I had been meaning to do that for a long time. I work at a corporate grocery store, where employees are treated poorly, no one gets more than minimum wage, and all the supposedly 'fresh' foods are shipped to us in bags from a factory. It's a sad state. I will no longer buy food from the deli section now that I know where it comes from and how it's prepared. Oh yeah, and this is a fancy grocery store.

I'm no stranger to the health store thing, we had one in ET called Nokomis. My best friend worked there, and would snag me day old loaves of bread before there were given to the cows to eat. It was the best bread in the world, there were days that I would eat nothing but their Farmer's bread; with cream cheese, with Peanut butter, with nothing at all.

Then one day the oven broke, and bread production stopped. No bread, no customers, and Nokomis was bought out by the organic farm next door. I miss that wonderful bread.

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

They can have it!

Retreat! The minute insects that have invaded my apartment can have it. I even found tiny bugs living in my lettuce and in my sugar!

Tuesday, August 04, 2009

They Came From Outerspace

Recently, my tiny kitchen has been taken over by fruitflies. Clouds and clouds of them emerge everytime you throw something out, go near the sink, or the kitchen. I'm not sure where they all come from, Caroline's theory is that they live in bananas and emerge when it's gone too rotten. Where ever they come from, I want them gone.

I have set up a trap of a little dish of beer that is covered in plastic wrap, with a few little holes poked through so they can get in, but not out. A few fruity bastards have fallen for it, but I can't seem to get too many.